A Very Pissi Interview

Photo courtesy of David Ayllon

 

Chiffon Dior: Hi there Pissi! Thanks for putting up with me this morning/afternoon. After this weekend my body is feeling every bit of its thir….twenty nine years. How are you doing my dear?

Pissi Myles: Ha! I’m feeling like I had about the same kind of night last night that you did. I’m doing well, though! I had my Tension Tamer tea this morning, and I’m almost awake.

CD:Tension Tamer tea? Are you trying to get Coco Peru to notice this interview? I think her super power is to just KNOW any time that tea gets mentioned.

PM: If only she would notice me! I really do love Tension Tamer tea, though. Have you had it?

CD: I’m not really British enough to appreciate tea I think. Plus it would cut into my vodka time. Does it really tame your tension?

PM: It does if you use it to wash down a Klonopin! I’m totally kidding, I only take drugs when they’re prescribed by a trusted homeless person.

CD: If they have one of those prescription pads, that’s good enough for me quite honestly. So speaking of the homeless and drugs, lets talk some drag, shall we?

PM: Leave Lady Bunny out of this! She’s gotten enough press from me lately.

CD: It was nice of you to use her as a surrogate on “Bring Your Mom To Work” Day!

PM: I know! I was sad to find out, though, that she only did it for the free lunch.

CD: So you lost money on that then?

PM: I lose money all the time. It’s always fun to find it, though, like in my coat pocket a year later. That’s a rarity, though.

CD: That’s not money dear. That’s a used condom.

PM: Either way, it can’t buy me love.

CD: You can’t truly buy love. But you can rent it by the hour in some places.

PM: Like my bedroom? $2.40/hour, boys. Don’t be shy! *winks at the camera*

CD: Plus tips!

PM: JUST the tips! I’m a classy woman! *Laughs*

CD: Of course dear! See how good an actress I am? I barely rolled my eyes!

PM: Ha! Touché. At least you’re proving us all wrong.

CD: Its what I do best. So you brought up Lady Bunny. Tell us how that show with her came about.

PM: It was sort of a shot in the dark! The one year anniversary of my comedy show in Philadelphia was coming up, and I always have a special guest from out of town in the show. I told my boyfriend how much I wished we could get Lady Bunny, and he was like, “Well why not???” So I messaged her and asked if it was something she would be interested in doing, and she loved the sound of the show, so she agreed to do it. It was really amazing, I never expected her to say yes.

CD: Obviously Bunny is a legend but was she an influence for you personally in your career?

PM: Oh, totally! I’ve said on a number of occasions that I just want hair at least HALF as big as Bunny’s. She was the first drag queen I ever really knew about, even before RuPaul or Divine. I was obsessed with the kind of drag she did that was irreverent and silly. That was long before I even thought about doing drag, though.

Photo courtesy of David Ayllon
Photo courtesy of David Ayllon

CD: Let’s talk about how you got started. Where are you from originally?

PM: I’m from New Jersey (Yeah, keep on eye rolling…) and I started in a bar in Asbury Park called Georgie’s, which is where I really learned the culture of drag, and I shaped Pissi as a character. I also made some great friends there, and now things have come full circle and I perform a weekly show there on Sundays, which is so much fun. After Asbury Park, I kind of got sucked into Philly, and that’s a whole other story! *Laughs*

CD: It feels like Philadelphia has had a real resurgence in their drag scene in the last year or two. What would you credit that to….aside from Pissi Myles of course?

PM: Pissi Myles. Besides Pissi Myles, I would credit that to all of the people who go to Pissi Myles’ shows! I’m totally kidding, it’s a hard question to answer . I think the drag scene in Philly is really complicated right now. Mostly because the gayborhood there is so small, and there are SO many queens. It’s a bit cutthroat right now, which is a little disappointing, because there’s so much talent. I think there are a lot of really amazing performers, and the patrons really want to see them, but the community is still trying to figure out how to make it work. I mean, if you’re not Mimi Imfurst, queens in Philly don’t have booking fees. It’s just not a thing, because at most bars, they don’t pay the queens to perform. The queens have to charge a cover and keep that. So it’s a very young scene. It’s still figuring itself out, and I hope it will.

CD: Do you think more venues outside the gayborhood might take notice of the talent? I mean in New York City, there are so many restaurants adding drag brunches to their weekends. Could something like that happen there?

PM: It’s starting to happen a bit. The Hard Rock Cafe has a drag brunch on Sundays now, and my show is not at a gay bar, or even inside the gayborhood, and we’ve been running successfully for over a year now. I’d love to see it expand, but I’m not gonna sit there and hold my breath! *laughs*

CD: I have to hold my breath enough even time I get laced into my corset.

PM: Girl, I have given up on my corset! I’ve let it out and in so many times I’ve nicknamed it Anne Heche. The only thing holding it together at this point is duct tape and a prayer

CD: I have a love hate relationship with mine. I loving actually having a waist but I hate not being able breath, eat, drink or move.

PM: Right??? It’s awful. Like we weren’t already in enough pain, then you add a corset

CD: The one good thing is it helps me forget about the agony my feet are going through.

PM: Same here, when I think of your feet, it’s torture.

CD: Why are you thinking of my feet?? Freak.

PM: I was watching Godzilla, just train of thought.

CD: I’m going to let that one slide because I’m too out of it to come up with a witty response. So when do you know you wanted to become a drag queen?

PM: Ha! I don’t slide, the fat weighs me down. I knew I wanted to be a queen when acting wasn’t really fulfilling anymore. I got a degree in Musical Theatre, and I was pounding the pavement, but I would keep getting the same critiques- You’re funny, but your hairline… You’re too short, you’re too tall, you’re too skinny… which was the last time I heard that.

CD: Was that when you auditioned for The Nutty Professor?

PM: It was! I was the before model! I thought, “Fuck this noise. There’s no reason that my hairline should be the reason I’m not working.”, so I put on a wig, started telling mean jokes and singing songs, and that was the end of that! *Laughs*

Photo courtesy of David Ayllon
Photo courtesy of David Ayllon

CD: Where did the name Pissi Myles come from?

PM: I was actually fighting with my boyfriend on Christmas morning. He had shot down all of the names I’d come up with, and then he wanted to turn off my Christmas music. He knew he’d get my goat if he asked to talk about drag names again, and I had Missy Pyle’s name in my head, so I just yelled, “You’re turning me into Pissi Myles, in a minute!”. And it stuck.

CD: As in the actress Missy Pyle from movies like Dodgeball and Galaxy Quest? Dare I ask why you had her name in your head?

PM: *Laughs* Yes! That’s her. Her name was in my head because a friend of mine was working with her on Bare downtown, and he was also producing her show at Joe’s Pub, so her name just kept popping up. Now I’m on her wikipedia page!

CD: You edited that in, didn’t you?

PM: I wish I’d thought of it, that’s such good publicity. I should have thought of it earlier. But no, my friend sent me a screenshot of it a few months ago, which I thought was really funny.

CD: I think you probably need to get her to one of your shows.

PM: I’ve tried! I don’t think she’s thrilled about it! *Laughs* Bob the Drag Queen told me recently that he met her at an event, and he was like, “I know a drag queen named after you!” and I’m sure she just rolled her eyes!

CD: You’re saying she’s a little…ahem….pissy about it?

PM: BA DUM BUM! I have no idea, I guess it’s possible. I’ll have my manager contact her people for a business lunch.

CD: That’s very LA of you. “Let’s take a meeting!”

PM:” It is! Except I’m cheap, so the meeting’s at Chipotle… and she has to buy her own lunch.

CD: Nothing like a little E-coli for lunch.

PM: I prefer to think of it as a colon cleansing. It’s homeopathic.

CD: Don’t bring your gay agenda into this.

PM: I need an agenda! Right now it’s a bit willy nilly. Or nelly, since it’s the gay agenda.

CD: So for people have yet to see you do your thing, what can they expect from a Pissi Myles show?

PM: It’s a lot of me just being an asshole! *laughs* My drag is all about comedy and making people laugh. I try not to take myself too seriously, and you shouldn’t take me seriously either.

CD: You don’t have to worry about that dear.

PM: Ha! Didn’t think so…

CD: Peering into the future, what are some of the goals you have for yourself as a performer?

PM: I’d really love to try eating less and moving more, which is essentially the opposite of my goals up until now. I’d also really love to be performing in NYC more. I think of myself as the tristate queen, but I love performing in the city, whether it’s Manhattan, Brooklyn, Astoria… I love the drag in New York, and I’ve been really lucky to have started performing there a lot recently.

CD: Speaking of Astoria, can you talk a little bit about your new show “Queen of Queens” coming soon to…well, Queens?

PM: Yeah! It’s a new monthly competition coming to Albatross Bar in Queens, which is a really amazing little bar that’s just blowing up these days. Every month we’re going to have a show, and anyone who wants to compete can come and sign up to perform and compete for that month’s title. Contestants will have the opportunity to say a few words to the audience, perform a number, and then the top two performers will lip sync for their lives for the title of the month. It’s gonna be a ton of fun, and a great opportunity for young queens, or queens who’d like more exposure to come out and be seen.

CD: Oh good. MORE new queens….just what this city needs!

PM: Listen, someone has to take care of the elderly…

CD: I have no idea what you’re talking about and I don’t appreciate that side eye!

PM: *grins smugly*

CD: Is there anything else you would like to shamelessly plug while we’re here and I’m still talking to you?

PM: Yes! Miz Cracker’s rectum.

CD: I could just as soon get you a unicorn. How about some gigs to share?

PM:I’m pretty sure she’s had a unicorn or two, but if you mean shows, you should definitely stop by Queen of Queens at Albatross Bar on January 24th, and I’ll also be performing there with a solo show on the 30th. Otherwise, check out Facebook (here) to find out where you can catch me in New Jersey and Pennsylvania!

CD: Well my dear, I think we have just about reached the end of the road here but it was a pleasure talking with you….more or less. Do you have any final words of wisdom for our readers before we call it a day?

PM: Thanks! It’s been such a pleasure getting to chat with you too! I’m not really one for wisdom, as I’m sure my father would point out to you, but if you’re smart, you’ll stop by one of my shows and say hello!

Photo_By_David_Ayllon_4

About Chiffon Dior 454 Articles
Despite being a drag journalist for over five years, Chiffon only recently realized that she missed a golden opportunity back then to change her drag name to Rhoda Story.

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