Beyond the Face: Allusia Alusia

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I’ll never forget when I first met Allusia Alusia: August 3rd, 2012. The Olympics were on at Revolver Video Bar in West Hollywood (WeHo) and this queen I had never met before, with a pig on top of her red hair, asked me if the gold medal I was wearing was for “Watersports” or “Pillow biting.” I didn’t get a chance to meet this gem of conversational forwardness until another few months later, but every subsequent time I’ve seen her, I’ve found that she is one of, if not THE, hardest working person in West Hollywood, hosting events six or seven nights a week. With her brand of high caliber humor, Allusia is the shining star of West Hollywood nightlife and one of the most clever thinking, innovative, and creative queens to ever paint their face.


 

SS: Allusia, thank you for joining us. I’m gonna dive right in to the hard hitting questions…just who the hell are you and and how did you get into my house?

AA: I’m a cat burglar and I’m great with locks.

SS: Well ya look stellar in skin tight black!

AA: That’s my skin, you racist bastard!

SS: Oh…ummm….well what was the siren song that brought you to LA?

AA: I was actually deported down here by the state of Washington.

SS: Any particular reason you chose LA as opposed to glamorous another city like NYC, Chicago or Pigeon Forge, TN?

AA: I wanted to go somewhere with a big entertainment industry, and I won’t tolerate those biting winter months in New York. Plus the boys of WeHo are where it’s at.

SS: Was there a specific instance that you can point to where you can say “AND THAT…DEAR MARGERY…is the night…I knew I HAD TO wear a wig and makeup!”

AA: I was a queen right out of the gate. I used to trollop around the house as a little kid in my Mom’s heels and I’d sneak into her makeup drawer when she wasn’t looking.

SS: Did she ever catch you?

AA: All the time. I’m really not very sneaky, I’d make a TERRIBLE secret agent.

SS: probably make a better Bond girl than most, though.

AA: If I was going to be in a Bond movie I would be the villain, not some flimsy floozy.

SS: What would your villainous plot be?

AA: I’d distract him with a well-placed eyebrow and my dashing looks, then choke him out with my weave so I can take over the world. I have no idea what I’d do with the world once I had it though.

SS: Speaking of look & style, how would you describe your style and how did you develop it?

AA: I’m very eclectic. I like doing everything from genderfuck to glamour to rocker to Florida escapee. I like to be a different girl every night…plus the look depends on how many pills I’ve “accidentally” swallowed that day.

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SS: We have all been there sister. We have all been there. I just hope you’ve had enough “accidental pill swallows” to think that I’m Oprah right now.

AA: Oh hell! You aren’t Oprah?! What kind of trickery IS this?!

SS: No, no! I am! YOU GET A COCKTAIL! AND YOU GET A COCKTAIL! YOU ALLLLLLL GET COCKTAILS!

AA: Something here doesn’t add up, BUT I WILL TAKE THAT COCKTAIL!

SS: Have ’em both…courtesy of me…Oprah Winfrey *winks to camera*

SS: WeHo is a city that has many adoring denizens and as someone so important to the city please tell us what you think the best part of WeHo is and what the worst part of WeHo is?

AA: I fell in love with WeHo immediately. It really is a great community. I mean apart from the people who live there. No but really, my favorite part is the people. They’ve come from all over and formed a really interesting and unique place. My least favorite is the parking. That’s why I set my car on fire and rolled it into the LA river.

SS: I mean…what else is that “river” for? You improved it if ya ask me. You’re easily one of the hardest working queens around as you work 6-7 nights outta the week, do those opportunities find you or do you create the opportunities you want?

AA: One gig tends to lead to another if you work hard. Many of the opportunities I’ve had have come to me through building a good reputation. Now that I’ve created that, it’s easier to create my own opportunities and pass that along to help bring up the newer girls in town.

SS: Speaking of one of those gigs, You’ve had the chance to work with a pop music goddess when you joined Christina Aguilera on stage at the VMAs in 2012, how did that come to be and what was that like?

AA: One of my friends that I had met through another gig got me that audition! It was a lot of fun. Christina Aguilera is really fabulous in person. Quite stunning. When I walked onto the stage at the VMA’s I had never felt more electric and at home. A crowd that size can easily become an addiction.

SS: When you took that stage I remember thinking, millions of younger people are getting to see a drag queen in a prime position like that and how important that could be for them to see how great it is to live openly and honestly of who they are, did you get that feeling when you were in the moment, that you were influencing people in such a great way?

AA: Absolutely. That whole performance was all about embracing and displaying your inner self and not letting people bring you down. It was about claiming your strength in the face of those that would try to suffocate you with intolerance and negativity.

SS: Well you did it fabulously and the community extremely proud in that moment. You’ve done so much with your career already, what other goals do you have set for yourself that you want to see accomplished?

AA: Thank you! I’m getting into more of the production side of things as well now, which is exciting. I’m currently working on writing and producing a variety show and a horror film. I’ve done a few independent and short films, which I absolutely loved, so that is becoming more of a focus than ever…I’ve also been taking shoplifting lessons, which is exciting and I’m told can be quite lucrative.

SS: Wait, where the hell is my wallet?

AA: No idea what you’re talking about.

!!!LIGHTNING ROUND!!!

SS: Who is your gay icon?
AA: Cyndi Lauper

SS: What is your favorite song from the 90s?
AA: Fantasy from Mariah Carey

SS: What’s your favorite drink?
AA: VODKA

SS: What is one thing people should NOT do to you at a club?
AA: Keep your hands off my face and hair…everything else is covered in my video, How to Greet a Drag Queen, which you can view here!

SS: Where is your favorite place?
AA: My bed.

SS: What is your favorite piece of advice?
AA: Accept critiques graciously and never stop learning.

SS: And lastly Allusia, at NotSafe4Werk, there is one thing we love as much as cocktails…and that’s shamelessly plugging things. So our readers and I wanna know…what do you have going on and just how shameless can you plug it?

AA: I am a creature who does not know shame. I host Lip Service Mondays at The Abbey, Fantasy Tuesdays at Fubar, Stripper Circus on Wednesdays at Here Lounge, Thursdays and Fridays at Hamburger Mary’s WeHo, Saturdays we do Ride at Here Lounge, and Sundays at Rich’s San Diego. Find my videos on YouTube as AllusiaUltra, Twitter and Instagram as @AllusiaToGo, and of course Facebook. Follow me to find out about special events and get your daily dose of comedy!

…and you can always send me bail money on PayPal.

SS: Allusia, you’ve broken into my home, drank all of my liquor, stolen my wallet, and it has been an absolute pleasure having you do it. Thank you so much for sitting down with me today.

AA: I was never here and if you say I was, I’ll burn this place down. Thanks for having me! My ambulance is ready now, so byyyyee!

Keep geek.

-Sidney

About Sidney Stokes 191 Articles
Sidney Stokes lives in an loft apt in the gayborhood of New Nerd City on the Planet Pop, but outside of his head…he lives in Los Angeles where his interests are as vast as and spread out as LALA Land.

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