This is not a drill… The Walking Dead is back this Sunday! By the looks of things, there seems to be a little something for everyone whether you are into survival stories, tiger restoration, Melissa McBride, baseball bat fetishes, drama, mullets, and oh… Melissa McBride. It’s been awhile since the last season of The Walking Dead so I have brought on a very special guest with me to help discuss what’s to come this season. Everyone welcome WERRRK.com Boss Lady and the one responsible for my keyed car, Chiffon Dior!
Chiffon– Funny story, there is a queen here in New York named Kizha Carr. Well I guess that is more ironic than funny. And not in that Alanis Morrissette sort of way.
Spencer– Somehow I highly doubt someone else is responsible for keying “Spencer Sux” into my car… but sure Jan.
Chiffon– When in doubt, I assume it was Sidney.
Spencer– You didn’t hear, Sidney actually passed away after seeing the new “Black Panther” trailer…
Chiffon– Well then we should probably stab him in the head just to be sure he doesn’t come back as a zombie. Boom! How do you like that segue Spencer?
Spencer– Yes! Fantastic idea! Now that you mention it, perhaps we should put him in a box and send him to our enemies? Sort of like in the season 7 finale of The Walking Dead. How do you think Sasha’s death is going to drive this new season?
Chiffon– Well I think we were ALL dead when Sasha revealed all those rose petals from her wig in the finale. It was such a shocking moment!
Spencer– Oh god… rubs temples I’m going to need another glass of Coke…. Yes we were all feeling ‘so emotional‘ after that moment… but how do you think Rick and the others are feeling right about now?
Chiffon– I’m sure they would have been happy with whoever won. Sasha, Peppermint, Shea and Trinity were all amazing.
Spencer– Chiffon you do realize we are talking about The Walking Dead show right? Before you ask, no I am not talking about the “RuPocalypse” episode with the zombie Drag Race queens….
Chiffon-I feel like I have been brought here under false pretenses Spencer! I’m feeling very attacked!
Spencer– In the words of my favorite Pawnee reporter, Joan Callamezzo, “Gotcha!“
Chiffon– So to really answer your question, Sasha’s sacrifice, and the season finale as a whole seemed to indict a turn in momentum. I think Rick and company are finally going on offense against Negan’s crew.
Spencer–I think so too. Our survivors haven’t really been on the offense in a very long time have they?
Chiffon– Not at all. Rick was broken in the season premiere. I think he was too afraid to possibly lose someone else after what happened to Glenn and Abraham.
Spencer– I guess that is what happens when you watch your friends head get smashed in with a baseball bat. Do you think our crew has a chance against Negan. Remember; Negan had knock-off Milla Jovovich on his side.
Chiffon– I love that my Walking Dead expert says things like “Milla Jovovich knockoff” and “the priest guy”.
Spencer– Okay but do you know her name though?
Spencer-Okay don’t get smart with me… Anyways, who are you excited to see return this season? Side note, basically any choice besides Carol is the wrong answer.
Chiffon– Jerry! Duh!
Spencer– Gah alright, I’ll give you that. Since you won’t talk about Carol, I am so excited to see Carol. After realizing death is coming for her friends whether she is there or not, Carol is finally dusting off her Carolnator gear and ready to kick ass with machine guns and cookies.
Chiffon– So you mean you didn’t read the spoiler that she dies in the season premiere? Awkward.
Spencer– It’s not funny to make jokes like that!
Chiffon– Look at the flowers Spencer.
Spencer– Alright since we have answered all of the hard questions, what do you think about this scene at the end of the ComicCon trailer with a grey Rick?
Chiffon– Well I mean the only choices could be dream sequence or flash forward right? I’m going to go with a dream sequence/ hallucination. What do you think?
Spencer– I think it has to be a dream sequence. He will probably turn over and see Michonne. As much as some think it might be a hint toward the ending, I think the show is going to milk this cow a little longer . Likely Rick is going to take a bat to the head and dream about a time where Hillary is president and he can just chill with Michonne…
Chiffon– To be fair, the zombie apocalypse doesn’t seem so bad any more in comparison to this administration.
Spencer– Yeah I would much rather be apart of Negan’s gang then listen to Trump bash the NFL any longer.
Chiffon– Yeah, you and Eugene would be good pals.
Spencer– Why I oughta….
Chiffon– So I have a question for you before we go Spencer. What happens to Negan this season.
Spencer– If I know this show, Negan is going to kick our ass pretty hard right until the end. Somehow our survivors will defeat the Saviors But like the Governor, Negan will escape only to return and kick our ass again.
Chiffon– I think that’s a pretty safe bet. It’s tough to kill off such a good character, even if he is completely, irredeemably evil.
Spencer– Yeah I think Negan is definitely everyone’s favorite villain by this point so I doubt the show staff will want to get rid of him so soon. Honestly, they know once Negan is done the show will finally have to find a ending point and I am not ready for that….
Chiffon– Well, there are still villains left from the comic after Negan, most notably Alpha. So the end of Negan doesn’t necessarily mean the end of the show.
Spencer– Yes that is true, supposedly Alpha falls victim to Negan as well…. so who knows where this might go.
Chiffon– Geez, spoiler alert Spencer!
Spencer– Oh shoot did I say that!! I guess I need to lay off the Coke.
Chiffon– Like THAT will ever happen.
Spencer– This interview is over. Chiffon, thank you for your wise words.. I literally have no idea what is in store this Sunday. Hopefully we don’t grieve over Sasha too long and get to war!
Chiffon- So are taking me out for burgers after we wrap this up or what?
Spencer– It depends… In-N-Out or Five Guys?
Spencer– Alright we’ll do both! Let’s get out of here. Thank you for being here Chiffon and thank you everyone for reading along. Don’t forget this Sunday is the premiere of Season 8 of The Walking Dead. Then remember every Monday to check into “What The Walking Dead” for my weekly recaps!