Hello all and welcome back to Sidney’s Summer Cinema where in lieu of popcorn and candy we serve you cocktails with your price of admission (except we don’t due to liquor license stuff). That said YOU can go and watch a movie with a drink…but what is there to see….well grab a drink…and let me tell ya!
Avengers: Age of Ultron
The biggest franchise in the history of nerd ever returns after years of build up and so many nerd are gonna blow….their money on seeing this one many times. If the movie is half as good as the trailers then um….yeah the movie that kicks off the Summer movie season…will be the best.
Release Date: May 1st, 2015
Cast: Umm….a lot.
Fun Fact: Agent’s of S.H.I.E.L.D on April 28th, WILL be connected to the film.
Mad Max: Fury Road
Well they finally rebooted it and this one looks as insane as this franchise should be filled with hot car chases in the most post apocalyptic of ways.
Release Date: May 15, 2015
Cast: Tom Hardy, Charlize Theron
Fun Fact: The lead of this one is cool with the Jews.
Pitch Perfect 2
The Aca-Bellas are back and ready to belt it out in the sequel to the surprise hit of 2012. There will be singing, sass, and the hits of the radios you’ve heard the last year.
Release Date: May 15, 2015
Cast: Anna Kendrick, Rebel Wilson, Anna Camp, Brittany Snow
Fun Fact: Rebel Wilson will once again steal the show.
Ya know the section of Disneyland or World that has Star Tours and Space Mountain…well it’s now a movie.
Release Date: May 22nd, 2015
Cast: George Clooney, Hugh Laurie, Kathryn Hahn
Fun Fact: This will look pretty and fun.
The Rock in an action movie where there’s a big earthquake. I assume it was caused by him laying the smack down.
Release Date: May 29th, 2015
Cast: Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, Carla Gugino, Kylie Minogue, Colton Haynes
Fun Fact: Yes….you actually read Kylie Minogue’s name above this.
Entourage: The Movie
So after 7 seasons the boys of Entourage have one more story to tell about the same problems of Vince as an actor and now…director.
Release Date: June 5th, 2015
Cast: Jeremy Piven, Kevin Connolly, Adrian Grenier
Fun Fact: This is Sex and the City: The Movie…for bros.
Remember the reason, 20 years ago, that they didn’t open the park? Well apparently that doesn’t matter any more, but one problem, people are bored, so they genetically engineer a NEW dinosaur. HOW ARE PEOPLE BORED WITH ANY DINOSAUR?!
Release Date: June 12, 2015.
Cast: Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard, Vincent D’Onofrio
Fun Fact: The graphics in this film somehow look less impressive than they did 20+ years ago. Why that’s a fun fact…well…sad fact doesn’t sound as fun.
Disney’s new film about the day to day lives of the emotions inside your head that control you….but in a cute way…I assume.
Release Date: June 19th, 2015
Cast: Mindy Kaling, Amy Poehler, Bill Hader
Fun Fact: It’s a Disney movie….just already allocate funds for it.
Magic Mike XXL
I’m sure this film has a plot….but do you really wanna hear about it?
Release Date: July 1, 2015
Cast: Channing Tatum, Joe Manganiello, Elizabeth Banks, Amber Heard, Jada Pinkett Smith
Fun Fact: This film will attempt to up the sexy to make up for the lack of Matthew McConaughey.
Sarah Connor tries to stop judgment day….again…with Arnold…again.
Release Date: July 1st, 2015
Cast: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Emilia Clarke, J.K. Simmons
Fun Fact: In Sarah Connor Chronicles, Sarah Connor was played by Lena Heady who now plays Queen Cersei on Game of Thrones. In this film, Sarah Connor is played by Emilia Clarke who plays would-be Queen Daenerys on Game of Thrones.
Paul Rudd enters the Marvel Universe playing the super small, yet super strong, Ant-Man because this somehow factors into Marvel’s third phase.
Release Date: July 17th, 2015
Cast: Paul Rudd, Michael Douglas, Evangeline Lilly, Corey Stoll
Fun Fact: Hank Pym, in the comics, originally created Ultron.
Amy Schumer plays herself….need I say any further or more?
Release Date: July 17th, 2015.
Cast: Amy Schumer, Bill Hader, Tilda Swinton
Fun Fact: This is gonna be fucking hilarious.
Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation
Cylon actor Tom Cruise does a bunch of badass things in an action movie where some spy shit goes down.
Release Date: July 31st, 2015
Cast: Tom Cruise, Alec Baldwin, Simon Pegg, Ving Rhames
Fun Fact: I had no idea this movie was coming out till I saw the trailer.
Radiation makes four people superhuman but Fox pinky swears to not make this one as awful as the last two they tried to do.
Release Date: August 7th, 2015
Cast: Miles Teller, Kate Mara, Michael B. Jordan, Jamie Bell
Fun Fact: It’s ok if you didn’t see the other Fantastic Four films…you are better off.
Well that is just some of what this summer has to offer us cinema goers. Which ones are you most likely to see? Which ones are you most looking forward to? Let us know below!