The second half of season 2 of EastSiders is officially available on Vimeo. High thee hence, throw down your coins and support this incredible show! I’m four episodes in and I REALLY need a season three so just do as I say, damn it.
EastSiders is marketed as a dark comedy and while it has always had its funny moments, I’ve always thought of it as more of a drama. This episode, however, really plays up the comedic aspect and I found myself HOWLING at the screen many times.
OK let’s dive into “Thick Like A Lotion”.
Cal’s sister Hillary (played by Brianna Brown) is really overstaying her welcome. I thought Bri would be tossing Jeremy out of the nest by now but it’s Cal who is, giving this little bird her much-needed push after returning home from another night at Thom’s. Suddenly, in walks Ian coming out of the shower! WHAT?! We did see Hillary throw herself at Ian in the last episode but I didn’t expect anything to come of it…but he is single, Hillary is cute and he needs love too so I guess it’s ok.
Cut to Bri and Vera’s bridal shower. After 8 years and 2 kids, they are finally getting married and what is more appropriate for a lesbian couple than a bridal shower filled with sex toys. Don’t worry – they did have one token gay guy in attendance! There is a noticeable tension between the couple and we find out why later…
While at work, Thom (played by Van Hansis) is approached by Jared who tells Thom that he and Cal (played by Kit Williamson) should get tested because he just found out he has gonorrhea. Ain’t that cute! When Thom calls Cal to give him the news, Cal gives him some of his own: he’s shitting blood! To the clinic they go.
Hillary took Cal’s advice and went apartment hunting…with Ian (played by John Halbach). We find out this little fling has been going on for a month and Hillary is already ready to move in and have kids with him. Pump the breaks, girl! She is SO “Overly Attached Girlfriend”.
We catch up now with Jeremy, who is babysitting while Bri and Vera have their bridal shower. He goes outside of his patterns and asks The Doctor to the park. Progress! He does rattle off a long resume, showing his commitment issues. But is Jeremy really ready for more than just a hook-up? Can he let those walls down and actually find love with someone emotionally available? I’m really rooting for him.
Things get tense at the bridal shower when Vera (played by Vera Miao) is called out for dating a man before getting together with Bri (played by Brea Grant). We also learn they haven’t had sex in six months and they have an open relationship. I’m starting to feel more sympathy for Vera, who I thought was just a lying cheater.
Back at the STD clinic, Thom’s hook-up app keeps going off (aren’t those push notifications annoying as fuck) and the couple gets cruised by some dude in the waiting room – in a clinic of all places! The queen who helps both Thom and Cal fill out their paperwork was HILARIOUS – he had me screaming! He was a highlight of this episode for sure which proves there are no small parts, only small actors.
Bri and Jeremy (played by Matthew McKellington) are stoned in the back yard, talking about Bri and Vera’s open relationship though she’s awfully jealous and untrusting (a bad combo when you are not monogamous). It turns out, she’s been tracking her via a running app on Vera’s phone…so much that she’s actually mapped out her trips and found that she keeps visiting the same address. It’s only a matter of time before Bri discovers it’s Ian and I can’t wait for that shit show! Speaking of Vera, we find her at (you guessed it) Ian’s place! She’s pissed that he’s been avoiding her calls and that he ended up breaking the rules by calling HER. He’s really playing with fire and as the cliche goes, he will get burned.
Back at the clinic, the doctor recommends to Thom and Cal that they get on PrEP because, as he puts it, they’re “slutty”. Normally I’d bristle over the PrEP slut shaming, but it’s a comedy and I have a sense of humor. He also recommends no sex for a week and no booze for three days (because he didn’t think Cal could last an entire week). Boy does he have Cal’s number! They both get shots to clear up their infections and we’re treated to a double dose of cute bare butts. I demand more cute bare butts!
With so many pots boiling, I am expecting a pretty explosive finale to this season. I cannot wait to see how episode 5 goes. I really hope we get some Val (Cal’s mom, played by Traci Lords) who we haven’t seen all season. I need her in my life like she needs a gin martini. Or five.
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