I know what you are thinking… “Wow, Sidney is like extra attractive this week!” Well surprise, it’s not Sidney. It’s me…. Spencer! Wow, your week just got so much better. Sidney is currently busy tying himself to fisherman boats to save the whales. So I am taking over. We have no more time to waste. Game on!
The Most Awesome of Things
This episode was another reunion episode. We got to see Jamie with Tyrion, Jorah with Daenerys, Tormund with Jon, Davos and Gendry, and The Hound with…. well everyone.. My favorite of course was watching Jamie and Tyrion. Their relationship is so special but also complicated and I think that awkward tension was perfectly displayed here. They want to be brothers… but they grew up living completely different lives. Peter and Nikolaj work perfectly together! We are starting to see many sides too Jamie. Now I just want to see Arya and Jon meet up and I’ll be satisfied.
Cersie telling Jamie she is pregnant was actually somewhat beautiful. If you think about it, they have never been able to raise a child together…SO it kind of warms my heart knowing Cersei has a chance to finally do something that makes her happy. Maybe Cersei will survive this war and just take the baby and run? Wishful thinking. But let us remember, there is a pretty good chance she is lying about this pregnancy. Why would she do that, I am not sure…. Perhaps she is using this “baby” to keep Jamie loyal to her throughout this war. I am pretty sure we saw this plot play out in another Oscar nominated film… it was.. gosh what was it called? Oh right… Norbit with Eddie Murphy! Cersei is very calculated so we shall see.
Speaking of wishful thinking, when is Jon going to finally figure out who he is! Drogon let Jon pet him because he can sense the Targaryen blood flowing through him. Jon is the true heir to the Iron Throne. I think Dany is starting to realize there is something special about Jon… but like, just in a sexual way which is why I want to pull my hair out. He is your nephew. You two could have EVERYTHING. But all you care about is maybe hitting up the smush room at Dragonstone. Gosh this is so frustrating. Apparently Ancestry.com is not a thing in Westeros. This scene was so deep, I love it. Hurry up before everyone dies!
The Good Stuff
Starting the episode off with Jamie and Bronn getting out of that randomly deep water was just what I needed. Honestly my anxiety was killing me while waiting to see if they survived. But I would have liked to just have a moment where we could see the actual rescue. I know we don’t have a lot of time, but just a single minute? Oh well. Game of Thrones is on speed right now so we don’t really have time for minor details. They are alive and that is all that matters.
Seeing all of our male hero characters gather at Eastwatch was pretty dope. I felt like we have assembled the Game of Thrones version of the Avengers. But going past the wall to capture a Wight and bring it back?? That is not a good idea, like at all. How is that going to work. Prediction: it wont. I heard a interesting theory though tonight, what if Jorah dies and becomes a wight. That would definitely convince Daenerys… Ugh so sad, don’t say those things! Next week is going to be a huge mouthful of chaos and destruction. Honestly, I doubt half of those characters will come back. The preview for next weeks episode showed a crap ton of baddies pass the wall and I doubt our heroes can fight them off. Unless Daenerys gets off her ass and brings her flying lizard child for a tour of Eastwatch. I still have PTSD from the Hardhome episode so…
Dickon dying by dragon fire was cool, but I felt like there was a fantastic potential story line right there. I for one would have enjoyed watching Dickon grow as a character. Once again, the show doesn’t have time for any new plots which is really depressing. Did anyone else not care when Randyll Tarly died though? He turned on Olenna Tyrell. Randyll and Dickons death would make Sam the new lord of the Tarly family right…? I want to say that is cool but honestly, who cares?
Speaking of useless people, Sam… I get it, you hate doing all of this unpaid-intern work… but we only have like nine episodes left in total so we do not have time for your blabbering. Your girlfriend was finally getting ready to reveal the secret of Jon Snow’s creation, but you had to just keep talking and make everything about your bad day at work. I imagine the way Gilly felt is how every professional female feels in every meeting ever.
This Petyr Baelish story-line is starting to drag on… Bro, if you are going to do something shady, just do it. Watching him reverse-stalk Arya gave me the heebie-jeebies. Obviously he is trying to get Sansa to take over and push Jon out… Or push Arya out. I don’t really know but he is sketchy and he needs to go. I have this theory Arya gets a hold of Catelyn’s face and uses it to kill Petyr. Oh, that would feel so good.
Eastwatch, in Summation.
Bronn saving Jamie just so he can read him is my dream level of petty. If I could redo the 2016 election, I would switch out “I’m With Her” for “Bend The Knee” and switch Tim Kaine with a very large dragon. Dickon is Dick-Gone… Jon petting Drogon and still knowing nothing is the best way to describe Jon’s character. Sir Jorah and Daenerys are the real relationship goals. Varys is that boyfriend/girlfriend who reads your texts while you are in the shower. I don’t remember anything Sansa said because I was too busy yelling “YASSSSSSS” as she sashayed through the Winterfell hallways in that outfit. Iv’e never wanted to witness a hug as bad as I did watching Tyrion and Jamie talk. Gendry Baratheon spending all this time making weapons was not as fun as my alien abduction idea. It’s all fun and games until you realize you just celebrated an incest pregnancy… If Maxine Waters is watching Game of Thrones right now, she is definitely yelling “Reclaiming my time!” every time Sam has a scene. If anyone colluded with Russia, it’s Petyr Baelish. The new Avengers: Eastwatch War movie looks great, I love the casting.
This week we witnessed several positive moments and the final calm before the storm. Honestly, I would be surprised if we have any other happy moments this season. Because next week… well… Winter is here.
Thank you for having me. The night is dark and full of burgers.