Racing With Haley: Queens Everywhere

This is it, guys. The episode we’ve all been waiting for! The final four advanced to the finale on RuPaul’s Drag Race and we laughed, we cried, we bid farewell to Vanessa ‘Vanjie’ Mateo. This episode was a doozy, so let’s jump into it.

Of course, the room felt empty without Nina West. Brooke Lynn Hytes struggled with the loss of her friend, while Silky Nutmeg Ganache cried set up that she almost went home. A’Keria Davenport were confused how Nina left but the two queens who the queens said should go home are still there. She was also surprised why Silky didn’t turn it after she was telling RuPaul to put her in the bottom the whole time. At least Silky made up with Yvie Oddly, right?

The final five entered the workroom for the very last time! I loved Yvie’s workroom lipstick choice. Guess who greeted the girls? Not RuPaul, but the queen herself, Michelle Visage. (Check out the snazzy padding by our friends at Planet Pepper!) She said the challenge for the week included recording their own lyrics to Ru’s new single Queens Everywhere. Then, Todrick Hall would help them with some intense choreography that they would perform on the mainstage. THEN, they would hit up Ru and Michelle’s podcast, What’s The Tea! Anyone else tired from that rap sheet alone?

I loved that A’Keria wrote two pages off song lyrics, as well as how Vanjie said she felt like she raps everyday and everyone agreed it seems like she does. Brooke’s lyrics would be a tribute to her homeland, Canada, and if there isn’t a lyric about hockey there will be hell to pay from yours truly.

Miss Vanjie hit the studio with Todrick first. She had a lot of fun with it, because of course she did. The sound effects she made? Incredible. Yvie was next and she got a lot of praise for her lyrics, but Todrick was worried she didn’t have enough time to breathe with all the words. Brooke was SO into her rap even though it was a bit rough. Feminem, her self appointed rap name, was confident, though. Silky’s rap was an empowerment anthem to big queens, which was a great idea, but she didn’t execute it well. A’Keria was the last queen to see Todrick and he went hard on her.

Meanwhile, at the podcast, A’Keria said she has legal guardianship of her brother’s son. She saved him from foster care. My god, what an angel. This story was SO touching and now I somehow love her more, which I didn’t think was possible. Silky got to talk about her degrees with Ru and Michelle, which is an aspect of her life I’ve always been interested in. She has a BA and an MA, which is amazing. Yvie showed a lot of vulnerability with Ru and Michelle, which was great to watch. Then came Brooke, who admitted she never had a boyfriend. Respect! Last but not least was Vanjie, who raved about her mom. It was the cutest thing ever. We also got some Branjie gossip and lot’s of Vanjiesms. It was a 10/10 podcast experience.

Then came the choreography. Vanjie was wearing her outfit from season 10 on her head, which was insane. A’Keria struggled with the choreography, but at least she’s honest about not being a dancer (but not like not a dancer). Brooke, tha ballerina, couldn’t keep up as well with hip hop, which was hilarious. Yvie looked like one of those inflatable car salesman, her words, and she owned it. It seemed like more girls struggled with the choreo than not. Also, turns out the queens also have to do a one take dance number! On top of that! I’m sweating and I’m just sitting on my couch.

As the girls got ready to hit the mainstage, they got cocktails from Micky’s West Hollywood. I think Ru knew their nerves would be wrecked after that choreography. The queens had a really adorable moment where they went around the workroom and thanked each other. SO precious! Until Yvie said she was burning the place down if she didn’t make it to the top four.

On the mainstage, Ru was joined by just family. Michelle, Ross Matthews, Carson Kressley, and Todrick Hall were ready to crush one queen’s dreams, as always. Then it was time for the one take performance! A’Keria NAILED her choreo. Brooke killed it and looked gorgeous but left hockey out of her lyrics so she’s dead to me. Silky and Vanjie’s choreo covered up that they didn’t have their words down, which was disappointing. Yvie looked like she was possessed by demons which is my favorite aspect of her performance, so I was living.

On the main stage, the category was best drag. Brooke Lynn came out in a beautiful ballerina outfit and showed off her moves, which was amazing. Silky had big hair with a nude illusion gown. Vanjie’s best drag was a bit disappointing, but I loved her ode to Scarlett O’Hara. Yvie’s look included a third eye and only three fingers. I couldn’t ask for more from our favorite odd queen. Last but definitely not least was A’Keria. She looked absolutely stunning.

During the critiques, the judges had only kind words for A’Keria, which was much deserved. On the other hand, they didn’t have much positivity for Brooke, which surprised me. Michelle was the only judge to hold Silky accountable for her mistakes, otherwise everyone praised her. Vanjie was another queen who fell flat during the performance and the judges took notice. Yvie’s critiques were so positive and I was SO excited for her. I think she really needed to hear those kind words from the judges. Such a cute moment.

Then came the sappy moments and the adorable baby photos of the queens. I’ll save you the tears and keep those emotional monologues to myself. All I have to say is two year old Brooke Lynn should take off that Edmonton Oilers shirt. I am going to lose my job here with all these hockey references. Sorry, Chiffon!

Instead of making all the queens lip sync for their chance to advance to the finale, Ru pitted Branjie against each other because of course she did. Vanjie saying she wished she could perform against anyone but Brooke Lynn was so sad! To Pride: A Deeper Love by Aretha Franklin. This lip sync was so good, though, so I’m not going to complain. In the end, Vanjie sashayed away. It was pretty obvious she was going to go but I don’t think I was ready to say goodbye. Her exit was ridiculous and hilarious. Goodbye, you wild woman you.

Which team are y’all repping? Team A’Keria? Team Silky? Team Brooke Lynn? Team Yvie? Sound off in the comments below!

Advertisements
About Haley Van Horn 92 Articles
One small brushfire away from completing the Serial Killer Triad, Haley is a hell-raising college student and sports journalist. Calling the suburbs of the gayest city in America home, she's sure to bring it to you every ball.

Be the first to comment

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.