Racing With Haley: Roast in Peace

This week RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars was back and boy was it fun. To quote gay icon Stefon, this episode had everything; dead Lady Bunny, comedy, crying, and a break in All Star rules. We needed this after the emotional rollercoaster this show took us last week.

The queens returned to the workroom and the absence of Latrice Royale was instantly felt. It’s only been one episode and I miss that laugh. Of course, she left a heartfelt and funny message on the mirror. Manila Luzon was still mourning the loss of her friend and can you blame her? Regardless of the pain we felt at the beginning, we must celebrate that Monique Heart’s wig stayed on during a lipsynch. Manila revealed that Monet X. Change’s lipstick was in her bra. The queens faulted Manila for wanting to save her friend, but I think if they were in her shoes they would want to save their friends too. Monet made it clear she would send Manila home if that opportunity came and I think this storyline is tired. LET IT GO!

It was a new day and Valentina gave us another A+ model entrance. Manila announced that her best friend was no longer with us, making it seem like she was dead. The good news is Latrice is still alive and well, it’s Lady Bunny who is dead. After being on this earth for 200 years, Bunny finally died. RuPaul revealed that it was she who put Lady Bunny in drag for the first time, over 100 years ago. So, she’s who we have to blame. Sorry, I’m a bit in the spirit of tonight’s episode. The queens had to write a eulogy roast for our beloved Bun Bun. Since Monique won the challenge, she had the added pressure of putting the queens in performance order and we all know that ALWAYS goes well!

It was time to start writing their routines and putting the lineup together. Sounds fairly routine, right? Obviously not, this is Drag Race, someone has to say something weird in this timeframe. It was Monet who gave us the great moment this week, revealing she and her friends crashed a funeral, to which Naomi Smalls responded, “you are so high”. That took us into Monet’s confessional where she insisted everyone has crashed a funeral before. Maybe she is high.

Okay, back to the stuff that actually matters. Monique assembled her lineup. Monet would kick things off, followed by Trinity Taylor, Monique herself, Valentina, Naomi, and closing with Manila. Monique putting Manila last was an absolute strategy. Manila has been killing comedy challenges, so she was intentionally put last. I can’t say I didn’t see this coming. Ru came to run over some jokes with the contestants and Valentina’s jokes were a bit rough. She made it through the roast on season 9, to which she said she did well, and RuPaul quickly reminded her she was not funny. RuPaul’s brutal honesty, there is nothing like it.

The comedy queens worked with Saturday Night Live’s Cecily Strong in order to have their jokes in tip-top shape for Lady Bunny’s funeral. I just have to point out how beautiful she looked. Okay, that’s all I have to say. Just kidding, I guess. She gave great criticism. I really loved when she told Monique to save room for laughs and they showed her getting talked over by Monique. The beauty of editing. I really loved Trinity’s joke about Bunny being ugly her parents are now vegetarian. It made no sense but I thought it was beautiful anyway.

It was elimination day and Valentina came into the workroom in a full fur coat look, love that for her. It was time for the queens to do their makeup, so of course, it was time to start talking about elimination strategies. When will they let this go?! Somehow, Manila was able to convince Monet of where she was coming from with loyalty to friends and how it changes as she grows closer to the queens. Trinity and Monique weren’t as onboard with it. WE KNOW! THIS HAPPENS EVERY WEEK!

Okay, rant over. It’s time for the roast of Lady Bunny. Michelle Visage, Ross Matthews, Yvette Nicole Brown, and Cecily Strong joined RuPaul to celebrate the fake death of Bunny. I really loved that Lady Bunny laid on the stage in a fake coffin, pretending to be dead. Monet kicked the show off and got nothing but laughs. Even Bunny was laughing in her grave. Trinity came next and well, she wasn’t so lucky. She fumbled over words and her jokes fell flat. Monique played a preacher character that went over well with the judges and crowd. Naomi really struggled, as did Valentina. Manila closed the show out, entering with a large umbrella, which was fabulous. We finally found out how Bunny died thanks to Manila, she passed at a hot dog eating contest. She also read her will and testicle, Bunny was so giving.

On the runway, the category was angelic white, because Bunny was obviously so angelic and pure, right? Sure, we’ll go with that. This runway was to die for, but Naomi’s look took the cake for me. When the judge’s critiques came in, Monet and Manila got the highest praises on both their performance and look. They were very obviously the top two of the week. Trinity, Valentina, Monique, and Naomi all found themselves in the bottom.

It was time for the bottom queens to plead their cases to the top queens in the workroom. I loved Monet’s joke in her confessional, saying Manila might send RuPaul home. Doing the math, everyone’s report card seemed pretty equal. The queens were judging Manila for her tactics on elimination, but suddenly found themselves in a situation where report card may not work out in their favor, yikes! Valentina made a bold statement, saying she shouldn’t be in the bottom because the judges laughed at her performance. I mean, I heard crickets, but I love your confidence, girl. Even Trinity, Valentina’s closest friend in the competition, said she should go home. It was a tricky one this week, but Monet and Manila came to a conclusion and stuck a lipstick in their boobs. I never thought I’d ever write those words down until All Stars came into my life. Thanks, RuPaul.

Manila and Monet hit the mainstage to lipsynch for their legacy to Jump To It by Aretha Franklin. Two of the most charismatic queens performing to Aretha? Thank you so much. I didn’t love anything more than Yvette’s reaction to the lipsynch, though. I also really loved how Manila and Monet fed off each other. It was too cute, truly. In the end, they both won! The bottom four came forward and it was time to see the two lipsticks Manila and Monet had pulled. Or was it? Turns out no one was going home this week and All Star rules are suspended until further notice. The queens were sent back to the workroom to wait for instructions. I’m sorry, WHAT?! Upon returning to the workroom, we see a note from Ru herself telling the queens to get ready to lipsynch for their lives. Lady Bunny returned from the dead and scared us all, she also brought back all the eliminated queens from the dead! Next week’s episode looks full of drama. The eliminated queens are pulling lipsticks?! I have no idea what is happening but I am not complaining that we get more Latrice and Jasmine Masters on our tv’s! What the heck do you guys think will happen? PLEASE comment your theories below because I have no idea what is happening.

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About Haley Van Horn 83 Articles
One small brushfire away from completing the Serial Killer Triad, Haley is a hell-raising college student and sports journalist. Calling the suburbs of the gayest city in America home, she's sure to bring it to you every ball.

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