EPISODE NINE: DIVINE INSPIRATION
Hello hello hello everyone and welcome to another episode of Talking Drag Race with Chiffon Dior. Assuming you’re not asking for money, my name is Chiffon Dior and we are going to straight to a very on edge work room. Maybe Katya can sum it up for us. Of course she can because she’s a godsend for me when it comes to writing this column.
“You can smell the resentment in the room, as much as you can smell Violet’s BO.” -Katya
Pearl waxes poetic about how the dynamics have dramatically shifted since Trixie left but I think Violet really summed up the moment the best…….
So it was time for an appearance by RuPaul herself (most certainly not via she-mail) and she revealed that the library was now open! Now you see kids, once a upon a time a library was a place where you could go to borrow books. Books were things you could read to learn things rather just watching a how to video on YouTube. But in this context reading is putting on a pair of glasses and saying sassy and somewhat mean things to one another with just enough of a grain of truth that the other queens laugh, but not so much that you make your target cry. The goal is to sting them so they only resent you on the inside! Case in point….
“You keep training those corsets, pretty soon your waist size will be smaller than your IQ!” – Katya to Violet
“You should just make like your hairline and recede!” – Violet to Katya
See? It’s a lot of passive-aggressive fun, not unlike a NotSafe4Werk.com Monday morning staff meeting! Anyway, the highlight was when Pearl went to read Ru herself but the Big Kahuna shut down the library faster than a Republican governor would shut down…..well, a library. Trixie was declared the winner and Ru announced the John Waters (who ironically was a guest judge) themed maxi-challenge, yet another group acting challenge. Our fearless heroines quickly divided up into teams and were assigned their Waters classic clip they would be recreating.
- Kennedy Davenport and Katya in Cha Cha Heels
- Trixie Mattel and Ginger Minj in Eggs
- Violet, Pearl and Miss Fame in Poo
So the ladies head off to rehearsal with composer and musical producer Lucian Piane and his fabulous accompanist Our Lady J (Cheap plug: Check out my interview with her here!) but not before this happens in the work room…..
Of course, some people might say this gag worked better last season.
As for the runway, the theme was “Ugliest Dress Ever”. Finally, a runway competition I could actually win! I have a closet full of contenders for the ugliest dress ever! So the ladies in the runway in their Sunday worst although Pearl and Miss Fame were just too gosh darn pretty to be ugly. I know that feeling gurls! Ginger Minj walked the runway in a hideous lime green, clearly trying to incite Michelle Visage which prompted Michelle to offer guest judge Demi Lovato this career advice.
Michelle: “Don’t do that color Demi!” Demi: “Never!”
Meanwhile Katya, well….what’s the opposite of dazzled? She whatever that is in her crocheted dress. As always, we’ll let Katya explain it….
Ginger Minj becomes the first queen to win three challenges while Violet narrowly escapes from the trio of stink with herself, Pearl and Miss Fame.
Cue up the sounds of “Really Don’t Care” by (shocking!) Demi Lovato as its time for Pearl and Miss Fame to lip synch for their livessssssss…….only they didn’t apparently get the memo as the duo coma’d their way through the song and Pearl narrowly squeaked out a win in one of the most boring lip synchs in a while. Although this bit of genuine emotion happened.
So we’re down to our final six queens. Be sure to vote in our poll for who you think will win this season. Last week Katya continued to lead in our vote, followed by Trixie and Ginger! Who moved the needle this week? Plus, be sure to check out the latest episode of ELIMINATION TRANSFORMATION with Jamie-Lynn as she transforms into Jaidynn right here. Until next week, remember to have your drag queens neutered and spayed.